Saturday, March 28, 2009


it seems that i'm groping in the dark. yet, i still continue to grasp the truth in the absence of light. it's like a self-imposed torture and there's no stopping it. should someone stop it for me? a lot of people did but are not very successful.
i've read somewhere that no amount of logic would make the pain go away. so the question lingers; am i really in the dark or do i keep myself in the dark? so maybe to stop being irrational, you must counter it with another irrationality. i believe that is what they call the leap of faith. how is that exactly? don't think just jump. it's either i fall on a more solid ground or i'll soar high.


"When a man is willing and eager,
the gods join in."
- Aeschylus

you must feel that you deserve it.

Wednesday, March 25, 2009


"To guarantee success, act as
if it were impossible to fail."
- Dorothea Brande


"To forgive is the highest, most beautiful
form of love. In return, you will receive
untold peace and happiness."
- Dr. Robert Muller

Thursday, March 12, 2009

oh feelings

let me get this straight. i don't know if you ever have an access to this. whatever. i just want you to know that a part of me still feels the pain of what happened last year. i know it's insane to carry this pain a long time. but i just don't know how to totally let it go. a part of me is still amazed how i was able to love a person so much. i loved you so much and maybe i still do. what i really don't know is if i'm still capable of loving you after hurting me big time. i pray to God to give me strength to forgive you. i just have to remind myself that you're a good person and that you're not the type who would hurt someone intentionally. i hope you're doing well. you will be graduating soon. since i'm not part of your life anymore, i just want you to know that i'm very proud of everything that you've achieved. it hurts that you don't need me anymore but i just have to find my happiness without you in it.

Friday, March 6, 2009

Wednesday, March 4, 2009


from time to time, we doubt ourselves. we doubt our capabilities and we doubt if we can ever make things happen. these doubts tend to paralyze us from doing things to achieve our goals. our subconscious mind already pictured that we won't make it even before we even take action. it sucks when we stopped believing; believing in a bright future, believing we can be who we want to be, believing that we deserve a good life. somehow, our friends and people close to us make us see what we fail to see in ourselves. most of the time we only see our imperfections and our weaknesses that we forgot that we also have strengths. most of all God is there loving us, sometimes we aren't even fully aware of it.

God, this is the time when my mind is filled with doubts. no amount of positive thinking seem to make it go away. please Lord help me overcome this. there seems to be a placebo effect when i'm not in the right frame of mind. everything else doesn't seem right. Lord, i'm humbly asking for guidance. i'm humbly asking for light to clear my vision and be the person that i'm meant to be. it's not a selfish request Lord. it's just that when i feel good, i radiate that goodness to people around me. please, help me because i can't do this without You.